In or Out

(Original)

Even though our differences can separate us from society and makes us feel alone, with some perspective, they can also show us how we're alike and bring us together. The film "Lars and the Real Girl" does a good job of showing that when a person feels like they're different, they can act different enough to become an outsider. The opposite is also true. With a change in perspective, a person can change their behavior and have complete acceptance.

Lars feels, and acts, different than everyone else in his life and he doesn't seem to fit in. In the beginning of the movie he watches, from inside his room, as Karen approaches his door. Karen is his sister-in-law. He steps back into the shadows as she approaches so she won't see him. She knocks on the door and he delays, momentarily, before answering. It's all very awkward and uncomfortable. She proceeds to invite him to breakfast and he awkwardly, but politely turns her down. She persists until he lies and tells her he'll come after church but never does. There are several other examples of how shy and uncomfortable Lars is in his interactions. We find out later in the movie that Lars's mother died in childbirth and he is raised by his overly depressed father. Not helping matters is the fact that Gus, Lars's older brother, leaves home as soon as possible leaving Lars and his father all alone. This background leaves us with the impression that Lars's introverted identity makes him feel different even though there is nothing physically wrong with him.

In a desperate attempt to fit in, Lars chooses a friend that he feels comfortable with. The only problem is, she's not a real person, she is a sex doll. In this relationship Lars acts as if "Bianca" is a real human being. When he introduces her to Gus and Karen he is no longer shy and sullen, he has a smile on his face and is speaking confidently. He isn't just more confident with Bianca, he's more confident in all his interactions. He's acting normal in his relationships but it's not normal because one of the relationships is with a doll. But the relationship with the doll is allowing Lars to feel confident in the other areas of his life. It's a little confusing but these normal relationships (interactions) that he's having are allowing him to realize what "normal" is for the first time in his life.

Lars begins to see that he's like everyone else. It first occurs when he takes Bianca to a birthday party. They approach the front door and he hesitates, he feels like an outsider. He does ring the bell and once inside he can feel the stares. Margo offers to take their coats and seems to break the ice. During the rest of the party Lars is accepted by coworkers and friends, the final proving ground. It's at this party we get a glimpse of some normal behavior from Lars. He looks jealous of Margo's interaction with a guy. The differences are now becoming similarities.

The conclusion is, I summarized the story and then ran out of time.

(Re-write)

The film, Lars and the Real Girl, does a good job of showing that when a person feels like they're different, they can act different enough to become an outsider. The opposite is also true. With a change in perspective, a person can change their behavior and have complete acceptance. Even though our differences can separate us from society and makes us feel alone, with some perspective, they can also show us how we're alike and bring us together.

Being an outsider can be a two way street. One way is when people choose to separate themselves from others by the way they act. The other way is when people reject us because we’re different even when we want to belong. This movie showed examples of both. In the beginning, Lars is introverted but accepted, he’s only an outsider by his own choice. A good example of this is the scene where his sister-in-law invites him to breakfast and Lars refuses for no apparent reason. It’s only later, when he carries on a relationship with a doll that others start to treat him as an outside. An example of this was at the Christmas party where people were talking behind his back.

The film defined being an outsider as someone who is different enough to warrant special consideration whether or not they were accepted or rejected by the group. Even though the community accepts Lars and his issues he’s still different enough to be considered an outsider. The doctor in the movie accepts Lars to his face for his well being but talks about him behind his back (in regards to his treatment) with his family members.

Lars and the Real Girl does a great job of showing the different sides of being an outsider. This movie affirms the idea that the label of “outsider” can be self imposed or forced upon an individual and can also be removed by either.